How to know when your partner is love-bombing you and not being loving

By Rinshi Ansari, April 18, 2023

The ideal example of a Love bombing is from the movie Kabir Singh, where Kabir shows his love for Preeti in toxic ways. Many may feel justified by his actions, but often, women feel cornered by such men.

Love bombing is a manipulation tactic used by some individuals to gain control over their partners. It involves showering them with intense and excessive attention, compliments, and grand gestures in an effort to make them feel special and loved. However, this behaviour is not genuine love but a calculated move to gain control over the other person.

In Kabir Singh’s case, his actions towards Preeti, including trying to control her friendships and her appearance, are examples of “love bombing.” His behaviour is neither healthy nor loving but rather manipulative and controlling. It’s important to recognise that Love bombing is not a healthy or sustainable way to build a relationship, and it can have damaging long-term effects on both individuals involved.

Here are some essential signs that show it’s Love bombing, not love:

Intense and excessive attention

Love bombers shower their partner with constant attention, including phone calls, text messages, and social media messages. They make it seem like they can’t get enough of their partner and need to be with them all the time.

Quick commitment

Love bombers often move the relationship quickly, making grand romantic gestures and declarations of love soon after meeting. They may even propose marriage or talk about moving in together after just a few dates.

Love bombing feels like a whirlwind

Love-bombing relationships can feel like a whirlwind, with the intensity of emotions and grand gestures sweeping their partner off their feet. However, this intense feeling may be short-lived and burn out quickly.

Pushing away other relationships

Love bombers often try to isolate their partner from other relationships, including friends and family. They may try to control their partner’s social life or discourage them from spending time with others.

Demands constant attention

Love bombers may become angry or upset if their partner does not respond to their messages or calls immediately. They may become jealous and possessive if their partner spends time with others.

Emotional manipulation

Love bombers use emotional manipulation tactics such as guilt-tripping, gaslighting, or emotional blackmail to control their partner. They may also use the threat of withdrawal of love or attention as a means of control.

No real depth

Love bombing is often superficial, with the love bomber focusing more on grand gestures and attention than on building a deep and meaningful connection with their partner.

If you recognise any of these signs in your relationship, it may be time to take a step back and evaluate whether your partner’s behaviour is genuine or manipulative. It’s important to remember that genuine love is built on trust, respect, and mutual understanding, not grand gestures and constant attention.

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